We Are Young

Since I entered National Heart Institute (IJN) around 10 months ago, I heard a lot of sayings like “It’s been a while since we get young doctors on board”, or “This is our first experience getting young MOs around”. Comparing to the gigantic experience our seniors and bosses had, we are indeed young. We did not even have one fourth of their experience in Cardiac expertise. In these 10 months, I had come to appreciate how these varieties of consultants and skills had improved me in my work. And I have to say that I had never regretted my fate of being sent here in Cardiac Anesthesia training.


However, even if we are young, we are also in the team.


This is the fact that I have come to accept that even if we are young, our presence matters. But it is exactly because we are young, that we needed extra support and positivity. Most adults or elder people tend to tell stories of their times. I enjoyed listening to it. Because, for the lack of our experiences, we learn from the experience of others. I also learnt that, it is possible to make no mistake, and still failing. That is not weakness. That is life.

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Drama Review: Doctor Stranger

So, I finally have a little bit free time and I’ve been spending my weekend leisure to watch a drama last time. ‘Doctor Stranger’ as it called, is a symbolic to how a doctor can be a stranger in the hospital, being Hoon as the stranger at the beginning of a story bcoz he was trained at North Korea. But later Jaejoon said he was the one who is the stranger, bcoz he didn’t acted like a real doctor saving a patient.


It was actually a korean drama recommended by a friend. She said it was a really good drama; a good mix of medicine and politics, and good actors but sorry, I dont know much about Korean entertainment so I have no idea how popular the casts are. But I’d invest my time for a good drama be it Korean, English, Malay, Japan or anything. So I went ahead and watch it. Honestly though, it was very very good at the beginning, but it went downhill at around the last quarter of the series. And because it had such a good beginning, the disappointment of a bad ending doubled, because it was such a waste to an excellent start. It was actually a story about a boy who was a child of a famous Cardiothoracic surgeon in South Korea, and his journey for freedom in their communism political policy. There are four main characters, in which they fought in a surgical competition. Whoever won between Park Hoon and Han Jaejoon could do a surgery for the South Korean president. I’ll give my review to their characters and characterizations which will also explain why I was utterly disappointed.


WARNING: It contain spoilers so read at your own risk. If you plan to watch and wouldn’t like to ruin the suspense, please kindly do not proceed.


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Puisi: Gugus

Sekadar repost puisi yang ditulis tahun lepas.




Lembaran demi lebaran-


Nota demi nota-

Terkulai di birai senja; dendangkanlah

Sebaris Al-Baiyinah di ufuk mentari

Agar mampu dijalani terik hari

Bekalkanlah sepotong Al-Anfaal

Biar mampu diusap perit luka

Tarikan alunan semadah Kahfi

Agar gugur segenggam khilaf

Yang terus merantai celahan minda

Sajikanlah sepinggan Fatihah

Biar dibuka segala hati

Agar mampu diserapi

Segugus mutiara ilmu di celahan duri.



Dalili, 18 Mei 2013


Note: Semua puisi yang diterbitkan dalam blog ini adalah hak cipta terpelihara didaftarkan di bawah Perpustakaan Negara Malaysia. Segala cetak semula tanpa izin adalah dilarang. Terima kasih.

New Start

I just realized I haven’t posted anything for February. Shame on me. >.<


But in all honesty, things had been pretty hectic during that month. I finally completed 3 years of service in Hospital Serdang and am now working at Kelantan. I transferred to Kelantan around early February and reported duty right then. Experience? It was nice. I’m not sure whether I like it because the working environment was good, or maybe just because I came back to my own village. Either way, it was really nice.



My new office


The first day I reported to duty, I was sorted out and was placed at the Mother and Child Health in Klinik Kesihatan, solely in charge of the Obstetric patients. Meaning, I am in charge to see all pregnant ladies, including women 6 weeks after delivery. I would have to admit, I felt burdened by the task. I was never interested in Obstetric and Gynaecology. Don’t get me wrong, I loved the O&G training in Serdang. It was the best housemanship training of all departments I’ve been through. The head of department was the best among all, and the training was very productive. But still, I was never interested at the knowledge itself.


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Melodi Kami

“Jadi doktor bahagian apa?”


“Bahagian bius.”


Terlihat wajah kelat mereka. “Tak apalah, saya tak nak kena bius.”


Bukan sedikit saya berbicara seperti itu dengan rakan-rakan yang bukan doktor. Memang, bahagian anestesi tidaklah patient friendly. Dalam erti kata lain, kami tidak berhubung terus dengan pesakit. Ketika pesakit diberi kepada kami, mereka sudah ‘tidur’, kalau tidakpun, mereka akan ditidurkan seketika nanti. Ketika pesakit dikembalikan ke wad, mereka belum bangun, ataupun baru sahaja dibangunkan. Nak berkenal-kenalan dengan kami, memang tak dapatlah.


Ketika saya oncall baru-baru ini, saya menerima referral atau rujukan dari bahagian perubatan untuk seorang pesakit yang baru dimasukkan tiub ke dalam paru-paru, minta ventilator support kata mereka. Sewaktu pergi memeriksa pesakit tersebut di wad, saya dapati pesakitnya memang tenat, tapi masih ada harapan untuk sembuh. Jadi saya minta pesakit itu dimasukkan ke ICU. Saat itu rakan sekerja saya yang oncall bersama saya merungut sedikit.


“Kau jangan baik sangat. Kerja kita dekat anesthesi ni bersihkan kotoran orang je.” (Bahasanya sudah dilembutkan agar sesuai dibaca semua lapisan masyarakat)

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Tribute to My Late Guardians

Approximately one year ago, on the 4th January 2013, an incident had marked a history in my life. Followed by another incident on the 8th January 2013. Two consecutive news came one after another, making me almost wail in misery for almost a year.


Yes, a year. There were times when I hop into my Facebook and accidentally saw her post on my page, and then I skimmed through her Facebook page and then I cried—openly. Even though I did some effort to cover up but yeah, it was pretty obvious.


The death of my grandfather, followed by my aunt, whom I hold so dear in heart. They were once my smile and laughter, my joy and strength.

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